humour

1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."

3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

4. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

5. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

6. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" "It's Not Unusual."

7. I went to the butcher's the other day to bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

8. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"

9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

10. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

11.Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "DAM!!"