jokes
Two lunatics are released from the asylum after being deemed of no threat to public safety. On their first day out, they're sitting at a cafe enjoying a cup of latte. One of them has an idea and tells the other: - "You know what I've missed all those years locked up in the asylum? To watch a football game!" - "Then lets go to the football stadium", replies the other. They enter the stadium but it's empty. - "There's no game today" - "But I want to watch a football game!", replies the other. - "OK here's what we're going to do. I'll go down to the pitch and pretend to be the players and you can remain up here in the stands, pretending to be the fans. OK?" - As the 2nd lunatic agrees, the other one heads down to the pitch and pretends to be the football players. He shoots at airballs, pretends to defend and so forth, while the other cheers him on, boos the "other team" etc. In the midst of all the excitement, he grabs a plastic bottle and launches it at the head of his friend on the pitch. He is knocked unconscious and as he comes around he yells: - "You bloody fool! 22 players on the pitch and you had to aim the bottle at my head!" - "Think twice before accusing me! Out of 30,000 fans, you immediately assume it's me?"